Is it time to sell the Clown Shoe?
I’ve owned my 1999 BMW M Coupe (a.k.a. “the Clown Shoe”) since 2007. That’s a long time in Hack Mechanic years. I bought it when I was still firmly nestled in the income-generating bosom of my real-world engineering job. At the time, since I still owned my 1982 Porsche 911SC, buying the M Coupe seemed to be the height of frivolity, as on paper, the two cars seemed to be similar (e.g., tiny, fast, iconic, haunched, and craved by men from adolescence through dotage).
In reality, though, the two cars couldn’t be more different. If nothing else, generationally, they’re separated by decades, so much so that when I lost storage and thought I was going to lose my engineering job in 2011 and thus needed to lighten the automotive load, I kept the ’shoe and let go of the 911SC. My triple justification was that a) technology and vibe-wise, the Porsche really wasn’t that different from my 1970s-era BMWs, whereas I owned nothing else remotely like the M Coupe, b) SCs were common commodities, and I thought that if I wanted to buy another one when my financial situation stabilized, it would be easy, and c) the SC’s heads needed to come off to replace the leaky valve guides and seals, and I knew that if I touched the exhaust studs, they’d snap and I’d cry.
Of course, I completely blew it. Within four months of selling the SC, the value of every air-cooled Porsche went nuts. Even though I’ve bought other satisfying cool cars since, selling the 911SC, especially selling it when I did, remains by far my single biggest automotive regret. Even though, as the M Coupe’s stablemate, it’s been gone from the barn for 12 years, it still casts a big shadow, precisely because I’m terrified that if I sell the M Coupe, it’s going to “pull a 911” and soar upward faster than an AI company’s stock price.
A few years ago, I wrote in detail about the Clown Shoe. The 1999–2002 M Coupe (also called the Z3 M Coupe) looked like what it was, which was a skunk-worked design that grafted a shooting brake-style hatchback onto the back of the little Z3 roadster, and outfit it with the engine from the M3, a stiff suspension, fat rubber on staggered wheels, and a cool chrome-gauge-ringed interior. The design may be iconic now, but at the time, it was polarizing, with some reviewers saying that it looked like two different cars grafted together, and it didn’t sell well. Only 2858 M Coupes were built for the U.S. market. That divides into 2180 of the 1999–2000 cars with the 240-horsepower S52 engine from the E36-bodied M3, and just 678 cars with the more ferocious 315-hp S54 engine from the E46 M3. There’s also the non-M Z3 Coupe (2071 built for the U.S.)—a fine car, but lacking the M engine, the staggered alloys, the fat rubber, and the suspension tweaks.
But over time, opinion tilted largely in the Clown Shoe’s favor. Because it’s got that magic combination of a unique look, a great driving experience, a rabid enthusiast base, and low production numbers, the idea that it’s the next big thing seems grounded in reality. A succession of print and web articles have trumpeted the car’s coming appreciation, both aesthetic and monetary, of the car. My very M Coupe and I were even featured in “The BMW Clown Shoe Has No Equal” episode of the show The Next Big Thing with Magnus Walker. And, indeed, some M Coupes have reached truly spectacular values on Bring a Trailer.
However, a rising tide doesn’t really lift all boats, at least not equally. The stratospheric bid-and-buy prices on BaT apply mostly to low-mileage 2001–02 S54 cars with zingy exterior colors and seizure-inducing two-tone interiors. Mine is a driver-quality 105,000-mile S52 car in silver and solid black—the most common of all color combinations. Personally, I think that the silver tones down the car’s extreme lines, and that the solid black interior sets off those chrome trim rings, but the market doesn’t appear to value my aesthetic viewpoint.
The website mcoupebuyersguide.com does a pretty good job of tracking and displaying Clown Shoe sales, and the coattails of the six-figure 10,000-mile S54 BaT cars don’t seem to be dragging up cars like mine. So the car, while collectible, hasn’t reached the point where every example in driver condition is worth crazy money. Which is to say … it’s not a 911SC (mind you, the $20,000–$25,000 that my car is probably worth is nothing to sneeze at.)
Whether you sell a car or other possession or asset is always a judgement involving the gin rummy game of the left-brain issues of whether or not you need the money (and how badly), whether or not the car is appreciating, and the “opportunity cost” of the money, the space, and your time being tied up in it, and the right-brain issues of how much you like it versus how much you want to get into something else. In my case, I’m not hard-up for the money, and I do think that appreciation will carry my car’s value upward, but I could use a little simplification in my life. So, regarding sell-or-hold, it puts me on the fence.
But another issue is that—and I really hate to say this—I’m just not that crazy about driving it. And it has nothing to do with speed or handling. To be clear, the car is like dancing the tango with a supermodel on meth (or so I imagine). The problem is the seats. For some reason, the deeply-bolstered, overly-stiff seats have a long history of angering up my back. It’s weird. I can pound out 500 miles sitting in the vintage Recaros in my 1970s-era BMWs, but I drive the M Coupe for 45 minutes and find myself with low back pain. And the car is too small and the seats too narrow for the usual solution—a TempurPedic back cushion—to be practical or effective.
The seat discomfort issue was recently and viscerally on display. Last week, I wrote about my difficulty in keeping up with the 13 vehicles that I own. I cycled through the five cars I have in the warehouse on the Massachusetts/Connecticut border, and as part of that, drove home in the M Coupe. I stopped first to drop off some parts at a friend’s house in Worcester. Sure enough, the 45-minute drive was enough to make me feel like I’d been leaning against the pointy end of a brick. And this experience was duplicated on the remaining portion of the drive home.
When it’s difficult enough for me to find the time to road-trip the cars that are actual road-trip cars, finding the proper set of circumstances to enjoy a car that I can’t drive for more than 45 minutes at a time is difficult. So no road trips or weekends with my wife in the Clown Shoe. If the sole reasons to own it are to look at its fat, planted rear end and hope for further financial appreciation, are those good enough? Maybe not.
So maybe it’s time for it to go.
But that means preparation. As I wrote in my two-part series on how to sell a car, I typically begin by writing up a warts-and-all list of the car’s needs, then clocking through as much of it as I can on the assumption that it’s always better to fix something than to list it in an ad and apologize for it. On the M Coupe, the top three items on that punch list are ancient tires on curb-rashed and discolored wheels, a scuffed-up front air dam, and a cracked rear taillight. I’ve certainly had the experience of prepping a car to put it up for sale and filing off rough edges that I’ve lived with for years, only to have the exercise reignite my relationship with the car.
We’ll see what happens with the Clown Shoe.
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Rob’s latest book, The Best of the Hack Mechanic™: 35 years of Hacks, Kluges, and Assorted Automotive Mayhem, is available on Amazon here. His other seven books are available here on Amazon, or you can order personally inscribed copies from Rob’s website, www.robsiegel.com.
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Good luck with the fence-sitting, Rob. Now, if you could only find someone willing to trade you a 911SC for a Clown Shoe straight across, your problems would be over! 😉
DUB6, I’m amazed that I didn’t think of that…
My thoughts are 1) The car will probably go up in value, but not like air-cooled 911’s (I don’t think any car will), and 2) If the car is that uncomfortable, I think you should sell. If you can’t actually drive and enjoy it, take the money and run.
Just my 2 cents.
Rob, as a fellow bad-back sufferer of many years, having any car which inflames the pain seems like an appropriate reason to pass it on to the next person. Your inner back pain troll (he’s in there and he’s a bastard, but he knows what he’s talking about) will remind you that this particular cars hurts you, and the rational you will know he is correct. Best as always, John
Rob;
Love the story. I’ve had those sorts of questions also. Can you just put a Recaro, or other suitable seat in the car? I had to do that several times with cars and was always happy when I finished. I really like to drive my cars every day.
Swamibob, I have vintage Recaros in most of my vintage cars. But since the clown shoe, like most modern cars, it has a seat belt tensioning system as part of the Supplemental Restraint (SRS) system, and the tensioner is integrated into the seat, that’s not trivial.
Use the same seat belt and receiver, and just replace the seat. This might fit your issues?…
I feel your pain regarding your 911SC… in 2010 I sold a 1972 911T Targa, factory Gulf Blue on black with the optional sport seats… within not too many years the car’s value had risen 5x what I sold it for…
My butt is still a similar blue and black (black and blue?) as the car from kicking myself…
Rob- Good luck with the Eddie Munstermobile. I agree that it is a great car to drive in M livery (roadster too), but it just missed the mark for me.
If memory serves me, do I remember a 1980’s Siegel piece on a red 3.0CS that you swapped in a 3.5 and a 5 speed? After all these years, I remember that article (I think it was published in the BMWCCA mag) and still want that car. Great to see you still wrenching and publishing.
Woody, thanks for your kind comments. Yes, I still have the 3.0CSi, and I’m still writing for BMW CCA, both in Roundel Magazine and on their online platform BimmerLife. Here’s a recent piece I wrote about it for Hagerty.
https://www.hagerty.com/media/opinion/the-hack-mechanic/the-37-year-long-rolling-resto-of-my-bmw-3-0csi/
I think Wayne Carini wrote an article for Hagerty a few years ago about letting cars go. Always stuck with me. When you’re no longer driving it with a smile its time to let it go to someone else.
I can understand the battle between wanting to sell it and keeping it. If it gives you no joy anymore then it’s time to go. If you can’t bear to part with it well then you got to keep it, pain and all.
I agree that it is an awful car, probably not worth much. Ugly colors to boot. I will take it off your hands. I will suffer with the scoffing from the unappreciative, and go to the chiropractor as needed just to relieve you of this burden. You’re welcome.
Some people have genuinely saintly traits… 🙄
It’s up to you on the decision, but the Clown Shoe is the coolest BMW ever. My brother has a 2001 Z3 3.0, and although I’ve never complained about the seats, the shifter in his 2001 is the most rubbery shifter that I have ever experienced. Either way, my vote is to keep the Clown Shoe.
Not sure why his shifter would be rubbery. I have both the Shoe and a regular Z3, and they both have very snug shifters.
In early ’99 I bought my wife a new BMW 323i 4 door sport for her birthday. Soon after, my son’s high school buddy drove up in his new ’98 Mustang Cobra Convertible, which made me start to hate the ’97 Mustang Cobra convertible I had. So, buying the wife the new BMW opened the door for me to order a 2000 M Roadster, Estoril Blue with all black interior and top. I loved that car for commuting and short blasts on the weekends. I didn’t have back problems at the time, but 45 minutes to an hour in that car and my back was hurting. I believe the seats in the non-M versions were actually more comfortable. The same was true for the 323 sport versus standard seats. Made the mistake of selling the M to a good friend and regret selling it every time I see it. I like my TR6 for periodic blasts, but now think I should have hung on the M for the long term.
Cut it loose. As I also monitor the collector car world, values seemed to have plateaued, and if not, they likely won’t got bonkers like air-cooled 911’s did. More importantly: 1. If your back bothers you driving it, move it out. It won’t get better. 2. You don’t have the space for it and won’t admit it. 3. You’ve got the E-9, and you’re like me with mine, using the Charlton Heston line of “I’ll give it up when you pry it from my cold, dead fingers”.
I agree with swamibob. Swallow hard & pony up for a pair of Recaros or similar. If , down the road you do sell it, reinstall the stock chairs.
As I said to swamibob, like most modern cars, the clown shoe has a supplemental restraint system (SRS) that includes seat belt tensioners, and they’re integrated with the seat. Replacing them with Recaros isn’t like swapping them into a vintage car (as I’ve done with most of my ’70s BMWs).
It’s funny that this came up. I was just thinking not too long ago about “11 cars and 5 of them are stored not for free an hour and a half away. I’m a car guy and I wouldn’t go to that much trouble.” Keep the Shark, the Lotus, the Rialto, a 2002 or two, and start culling the herd down to 6.
I agree that a seat swap might be a good remedy for your situation. I think that car is a perfect driver given the miles and that it’s not “Mint”. It is still from the era when BMW made real “drivers” cars and a comfortable seat might put you back in love with it’s basic goodness. That the car is the most common color that isn’t as in your face as some of the other colors that were available means it’s not as much of a cop magnet if you find the need to give it some proper exercise. As far as I’m concerned any M car from this era will continue to appreciate especially given there weren’t that many of these models made. That you know how well the car has been treated goes a long way in my book as to it’s desirability. If there aren’t any looming big expenses coming up I think it will be worth hanging on to. Does the Z3 that you have been writing about have any comfort issues with the seats in it? My guess is those seats would be a bolt in swap and easily picked up from a dismantler or someone parting one out for not a huge outlay of cash.
The seats in my vanilla Z3 are different than in the M Coupe. They’re flatter and not as deeply bolstered. I can’t say that they’re comfortable, but I use the car very differently—I drop the top and let the sun and wind hit my face. I can get that experience if I drive it one mile or five or ten. That’s what the Z3 is for. I’m not sure what the M Coupe is for anymore.